Konke malunga nabantu abaNarcissistic

Umxholo

• Ukufundwa okubalulekileyo kweNarcissism
• Ukuhlengahlengiswa kolawulo: Izinto esizenzayo kuNarcissist

Kwisithuba sam sangaphambili kwi-narcissism, ndazisa uJosh Miller, Ph.D.-UNjingalwazi wezeSayikholoji kwiYunivesithi yaseGeorgia, kunye nengcali kwezobuchwephesha-owasamkela ngezandla ezishushu isicelo sam sokwenza udliwanondlebe naye. Ndimbuze imibuzo eyahlukeneyo malunga nokuthandwa kwe-narcissism, i-narcissism enkulu kunye nokunxibelelana kwayo ne-psychopathy, ubudlelwane phakathi kokuzithemba kunye ne-narcissism, nokunye okuninzi. Kwiposti yanamhlanje, ndibonisa icandelo lesibini le-Q & A yam.

Emamzadeh: Ithini ilebhile narcissism yezifo Ndithetha ntoni? Ngaba ibhekisa kwifom ye-narcissism ehlangabezana neenqobo zokuphazamiseka kubuntu (okt, inxulunyaniswa nokungasebenzi kunye nokuphazamiseka)? Ukuba kunjalo, ngaba ikhona into efana nokulungelelanisa okanye usempilweninarcissism ?

UMiller: Andazi ukunyaniseka, njengoko ingelilo ixesha endizisebenzisayo. Ndingacinga ukuba yenzelwe ukubonisa i-narcissism enxulunyaniswa ngokubanzi noxinzelelo kunye nokuphazamiseka kwaye oko kubonisa ukonakala okukhulu kwiinkqubo zokuzilawula ezinxulumene narcissism. ¹ Andiyithandi imbono yokuba kukho iintlobo ezahlukileyo zobundlobongela — i-pathological vs. Umntu unokuba engaphantsi okanye ephantsi kakhulu ephazanyiswe bubungakanani be-narcissism okanye indibaniselwano. I-narcissism esempilweni, ukuba ikho, inokuthetha ukuba enye inyuselwa kancinci kwi-grandiose narcissism kodwa hayi kakhulu ekubandezelekeni kwimimandla ebalulekileyo yokusebenza (umzekelo, ezothando; umsebenzi). Kwelinye icala, i-narcissism esemngciphekweni ayinakuze iphazanyiswe ngokuba "sisempilweni" kuba inento yokwenza nokuthambeka okungathandekiyo okukhoyo kunye nokuzithemba okuphantsi kwaye ngenxa yoko kufana kakhulu nomgaqo woxinzelelo obaluleke kakhulu kukuphazamiseka kwengqondo.

Emamzadeh: Kulungile, ndingathanda ukutshintsha izihloko kancinci kwaye ndikubuze malunga nenjongo kwi-narcissism. Omnye afunda naye wakha waqhula wathi: “Xa umntu odandathekileyo esithi,‘ Awundikhathalelanga konke konke, ’sicinga ukuba sisifo esi sithethayo; xa umntu othetha into engeyiyo esitsho, sicinga ukuba lo myalezo ulinge ngenzame yokukhohlisa. ” Ngaba uyakholelwa ukuba ukhona umahluko osisiseko, ngokubhekisele kwinjongo yokuziphatha, phakathi kokuphazamiseka kubuntu kunye nezinye iimeko zempilo yengqondo (kubandakanya nokunye ukuphazamiseka kubuntu)?

UMiller: Oku kuyathelekiswa kodwa okwam ukuthatha kukuba akunabungqina bucetyiswayo bokuba umntu unenjongo engaphezulu okanye encinci okanye ulungiselelwe kwangaphambili kunenye ngokweendlela zokuziphatha. Ndingatsho ukuba abantu abadandathekileyo nabangatshatanga banokwenza ingxelo enjalo ngombono wokwenyani wokuba omnye obalulekileyo akabakhathalelanga kwaye enze ingxelo ezinjalo ukuba aphume kuloo mntu ukuze bafumane okungakumbi okufunekayo (umzekelo, ingqalelo, inkxaso, njl.).

Emamzadeh: Inomdla. Njani ngokuzazi kwakho kwi-narcissism? Ndiqaphele ukuba ngamanye amaxesha, njengaxa kukhuthazwa umntu okhuphisanayo okanye umnqweno wamandla ukhuthazwa, okanye ngexesha leziganeko zomsindo woburharha, unokuziphatha ngeendlela ezonakalisa nabo abo babonakala bexabisa kakhulu. Ngokoluvo lwakho, kungakanani ukuqonda kunye nokwazi abantu abanamanqanaba aphezulu eklinikhi yokuchasana nendlela yokuziphatha kwabo ebachaphazela ngayo abanye?

UMiller: I-lore yeklinikhi kudala ukuba abantu abaneengxaki zobuntu abanalo ulwazi oluninzi ngeziqu zabo. Eminye yemisebenzi yethu kunye nabanye 'bayithandabuzile loo nto, nangona kunjalo, ngokubonisa ukuba iingxelo ezizezakho zobuchwephesha, isifo sengqondo, kunye nezinye izinto ezihambelana nezifo zihlangana ngokufanelekileyo neengxelo ezinolwazi. Ngapha koko, badibana neengxelo ezinolwazi ukuya kwinqanaba elifanayo umntu alifumanele ubuntu obuqhelekileyo njenge-neuroticism, ukuvumelana, kunye nokubhukuqa. Kwaye, xa zingadibani kakuhle ukungabikho kokudibana kunokubonisa ukungavisisani endaweni yokunqongophala kolwazi. Oko kukuthi, ukuba ubeka imibuzo kwinto ebizwa ngokuba yifomathi yokuqonda endaweni yoko (ingxelo-ngokwakho: Ndiyakholelwa ukuba ndifanele unyango olukhethekileyo, umbono-meta: Abanye bacinga ukuba ndikholelwa ukuba ndifanelwe unyango olukhethekileyo), uhlala ufumana isivumelwano esiphakamileyo nabasasazi. Esi sivumelwano siphakamileyo sinokuthetha ukuba abantu abaziphethe kakubi bayazi ukuba babonwa njani ngabanye kodwa banokungavumelani novavanyo lomntu lowo. Omnye umsebenzi ucebisa ukuba abantu abaziphethe kakubi baye baziqonde ngokwabo ukuze baqonde ukuba ukuqonda kwabo kuyathandeka ngakumbi kunendlela abanye abababona ngayo, ukuba abanye badla ngokubacingela kancinci ngokuhamba kwexesha, kwaye banolwazi lokuba Iimpawu ezichasayo (umzekelo, ubungangamsha, ukungakhathali, ilungelo) zibangela ukuphazamiseka

Oku ayikukhanyeli ukuba abantu abathandanayo babangela iintlungu kunye nokubandezeleka, kubandakanya nabo banokubaxabisa kwaye babathande (umzekelo, amaqabane athandanayo; abahlobo; amalungu osapho), njengoko behlala besenza njalo. Endaweni yoko, ndinokuphikisa ukuba ezi ndlela zokuziphatha zinokungabikho kukusilela kokuqonda ngokupheleleyo kodwa endaweni yoko kukuziphatha kunye nokuziphatha okunokuthi kulandele isoyikiso esaziwayo, ukubaluleka kwenqanaba, ulawulo oluphezulu, kunye nolawulo kubantu abathandanayo, kunye nokuncipha ngokubanzi kokuncamathiselwa ezinye ezenza ukuba ezi ndlela zokuziphatha zibe lula.

Emamzadeh: Ewe, ngokuqinisekileyo loo nto ipeyinta umfanekiso ontsonkothe ​​ngakumbi wama-narcissists. Ewe kunjalo, nokuba yeyiphi na inkuthazo, isimilo sokuziphatha kakubi asihambisani nolwalamano oluhle. Uncwadi lweklinikhi, i-narcissism inxulunyaniswe nokuphazamiseka okubalulekileyo (umzekelo, kwezothando kunye nobudlelwane emsebenzini). Kwale narcissism yomkhwa inxulunyaniswa "nokuzicingela wedwa, ukuzingca, kunye nendlela yokuxhaphaza kubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu, kubandakanya ukudlala umdlalo, ukungathembeki, ukungabikho kovelwano, kwanobundlobongela" (iphe. 171). ² Ke loluphi ukhetho lwangoku kunyango lwe-narcissism? Ngaba i-narcissism inokunyangwa ngempumelelo kusetyenziswa unyango lwengqondo?

UMiller: Ngelishwa, akukho lonyango luxhaswa ngezobupolitika ngeli xesha-ke oku kulandelayo kuyacingelwa kwindalo. Ngokubanzi, mancinci amathuba okuba umntu abone amatyala amaninzi "amsulwa" e-grandiose narcissism kuseto lweklinikhi, ngaphandle kokuba kugunyazisiwe yinkundla. Oko kuthetha ukuba abantu abathandanayo abanokuthi babonwe kuseto lweklinikhi baya kuba nemiboniso enobungozi ngakumbi (umzekelo, uxinzelelo, unxunguphalo, u-egocentric, ukungathembeki, ukuqonda ilungelo). Ngenxa yokuba i-narcissism esemngciphekweni igqobhoza ngokungaphaya kukuphazamiseka komda wobuntu (BPD), kunokwenzeka ukuba ezinye zonyango oluxhasayo lwe-BPD zinokusebenzela eyokuqala (umzekelo, unyango lokuziphatha okanye i-DBT; unyango olujolise kwischema). Ngokubanzi, ndicinga ukuba umntu kufuneka alindele ukuba ukuphucuka okubalulekileyo kuya kufuna uhlobo oluthile lonyango olunikwe ukubaluleka kunye nemiceli mngeni yokuphuhlisa ubudlelwane kunye nezigulana ezithandanayo. ³ Luluvo lwam ukuba abantu abaneengxaki zohlobo lwangaphandle (umzekelo, banengxaki kodwa abanyanzelekanga) banokuzuza ngokujolisa kokulahlekileyo ngenxa yesiphazamiso njengendlela yokukhuthaza utshintsho. Oko kukuthi, andiqinisekanga ukuba kulula kangakanani ukufundisa kunye nokutshintsha amandla okuqonda kodwa ndicinga ukuba abaguli banokuqonda, umzekelo, ukuba imikhwa yabo yokuziphatha kakubi ichaphazele kakubi imeko yabo kunye nokusebenza emsebenzini kwaye bafunda iindlela ezintsha zokunciphisa isimilo zibangele ezi ziphumo emsebenzini, abazikhathaleleyo ngazo (umzekelo, ukungafumani kunyuselwa). Kwincwadi yethu entsha yokuchasana ⁴ (UMiller & Lynam, 2019), esiyibona njengeyona nto iphambili kwi-narcissism kunye nokusebenza kwengqondo, mna noDon Lynam saba nethamsanqa lokufumana abaphengululi abaliqela ukuba babhale malunga nokuba umntu angalwenza njani utshintsho kwidomain enjalo ngokweendlela ezahlukeneyo, kubandakanya nokuziphatha kwengqondo, udliwanondlebe olukhuthazayo. , psychodynamic, kunye ne-DBT.

Ukufundwa okubalulekileyo kweNarcissism

Ukuhlengahlengiswa kolawulo: Izinto esizenzayo kuNarcissist