Phakathi kwalapha kunye nokuGcina kwam ukuGcina: iiMemoirs kunye noMlingo oNcedisiweyo

Kwawa malunga nexesha loKwindla lowasetyhini ngo-Matshi 2016 elindibekele ecaleni kunye nomnqwazi wam wepinky. Ndayazi ke ngoku ukuba bendithathe inxaxheba kuqhankqalazo lwam lokugqibela. Nangona ixesha elinye likholwa "kukuhlala ekhaya" - uphando malunga nokudakumba, isizungu, kunye nokuqaqanjelwa kwiintlanganiso zeGerontological Society of America, ebendizilandela iminyaka ethile ngoku, zindinyanzele ukuba ndiphinde ndiqwalasele. Intlanganiso yoNyaka ye-18 ibibanjelwe eBoston kule nyanga. Ngophando oluvela kwiindawo ezahlukeneyo, banike ingxelo ngophando olutsha lwesayensi kunye neendlela zokukhuthaza ukwaluphala okunempilo. Umbutho waseGerontological waseMelika.

Kwafika ngexesha apho ndaziva ndicelomngeni kwaye ndamkela izimvo zabo namandla. Ngaphandle kokubiza kwam "ndigugile endaweni yomthombo wobutsha" kwinqaku elingaphambili, emva kokuwa kuka-Matshi ka-Mfazi, ukhetho lwam lwalunomda: Ukuhlala nabantwana okanye ukuhlala kwindawo yokuncedisa-endandizibona ndimncinci kakhulu kuyo. Nangona kunjalo, emva kokufunda kwakhona Ukuba nguMntu ofayo nguAtul Gawande, MD, ndaqala ukubala iintsikelelo zam kwaye ndenza ukhetho.

UGqirha Gawande, a ENew Yorker Umbhali wabasebenzi, kunye nogqirha wexesha elide eBrigham naseSibhedlele samaBhinqa eBoston, uthi sinokonwabela ixesha lokuyila eligcwele intsingiselo kunye namandla nakwiminyaka yethu yamva.

Njengabahloli abaninzi bathi, injongo kaGawande ibonakala ivumela abantu ukuba baphile ubomi obunentsingiselo kwaye babumbe ibali lobomi babo. Ngelixa ukuhlala ngoncedo ngamanye amaxesha kuthathwa njengekhaya labathathe umhlala phantsi, ewe, kubantu abakuma-60s, 70s, nangaphezulu, kunokuba yindawo yokuqala i-adventure entsha. Ukuba u-psychoanalyst Carl Gustav Jung, owazalwa ngo-1875, wasongelwa ekubeni ngumhlala-phantsi ngokupheleleyo, ngekhe abhale enye yemisebenzi yakhe yakudala, Iinkumbulo, Amaphupha, ukuCinga ngo-1962.

Incwadi isenokungabikho kwikamva lethu, kodwa ukuhlala ngokuncediswa kunokuba yindawo yokuqala yamava obomi obutsha. Ababesebenza kunye nam ngaphambili bathelekisa ngomona ukhetho lwam lokuphila neMacDowell Colony ePeterborough, eNew Hampshire. Kukho ababhali kunye nabazobi abakhuliswayo ngelixa amaxa amaninzi begqibezela umsebenzi oqhubekayo.

Isimemo sosapho

Ukuwa ngendlela endiye ndayeka ngayo, kodwa ndaphinda ndabeka isicwangciso sokuqokelela zonke iikholamu ezipapashiweyo malunga notatomkhulu notatomkhulu kwaye ndizifaka encwadini yabazukulwana bam. Kwaye ngenene, ngephepha elimnyama elinephepha lesithombe, elenziwe ngomnye woodade bam, kunye nexesha lokubhala ngaphandle kokuphazanyiswa, I-Kisses yaseNtaliyane : Ubulumko KuMakhulu Wam, ngoku ikwiBordighera Press kwisiXeko saseNew York.

Kubantu abanomdla kwiimemo, kukho uphando olutsha nolunomdla oluvela kwiYunivesithi yezoNyango yaseHamburg-Eppendorf. Njengoko kuxeliwe Uphando lokuziphatha kunye nonyango kunye nokuziqhelanisa nokuziphatha, kwaneenkumbulo ezingonwabisiyo zinokutshintshwa ngokuzihlela nokuzikrwela ngokutsha: Ungazixabisa Njani iiNkumbulo eziNwabisayo kwaye uhlele abo badakumbileyo (ngeembekiselo.)

Isabelo

Ngaphambi kokuma kwethu kokugqibela, uninzi lwethu luneenjongo ezininzi, iminqweno namaphupha, okanye uluhlu lwamabhakethi. Uninzi lwabantu aluthandi ukucinga malunga nendawo yokugqibela. Nangona kunjalo, isabelo sesikolo esiphumeleleyo sasinceda ukuba sijongane nokufa. Sasinikwe uxanduva lokubhala eyethu i-obituary. Yayiyindlela yokujonga iinjongo zethu kwaye simisele indlela esinqwenela ukukhunjulwa ngayo. Bhala enye namhlanje emva koko uzibuze: "Ngaba yile nto ndingathanda ukuyithetha ibali lobomi bam?" Ukuba ayisiyiyo, buza "Yintoni elahlekileyo? Ndinethemba lokufezekisa ntoni?"

Omnye umfundi ophumelele esikolweni wathi ufuna ukuba ngugqirha. Umntu othile wamkhalimela esithi, "Uyakube useneminyaka engama-50 xa uza kuba ngumhlali." Wacinga umzuzu kwaye waphendula wathi, "Ndiza kuba neminyaka engama-50." Kwaye wabhalisa kwisikolo sezonyango.

Ilungelo lokushicilela ngo-2018 uRita Watson