Ukujamelana nexesha leCoronavirus

Njengabazali abaninzi ngoku abasekhaya nabantwana be-24/7 ngenxa ye-COVID-19, ndifumana izicelo ezininzi zoncedo, ngakumbi malunga nendlela yokukhetha amadabi abo nabantwana babo. Ibhlog engezantsi ijongana nalo mbandela. Ndayibhala ngaphambi kwesi sifo kodwa ndazitshintsha ukubonisa le nyani intsha. Ndiyathemba ukuba iyanceda ngeli xesha lexinzelelo ngakumbi xa abantwana abaninzi befuna kakhulu kunakuqala njengoko besokola ukujongana notshintsho olukhulu kwimisebenzi yabo yemihla ngemihla.

Omnye oneminyaka emihlanu wathi kungcono. Abazali bakhe balufunele uncedo izolo kuba ebenguzwilakhe opheleleyo oko kwavalwa isikolo. Ukuba ngumntwana onobuntu obuthathaka, uxhomekeke kakhulu kwiinkqubo. Ukwazi ngokuthe ngqo okulindeleyo kwenza ukuba umhlaba ulawuleke ngakumbi. Abantwana banentambo ngale ndlela-njengoko uninzi lwenu lusazi! -Babethwa ngokukrakra zizikolo zivaliwe. Ukumnceda, abazali bakhe abamangalisayo bayila ishedyuli yemihla ngemihla yokuzama ukuphinda isikolo kwakhona. Kodwa ayinakuze ifane ncam nesikolo, njengoko nabani na owakha waba nabantwana esazi.

Ke, ngaphandle kwemizamo yabazali bakhe, usasokola, kwaye uyayazi. Uzimisele kakhulu kwiimvakalelo zakhe-uphawu oluhle lwabantwana abanolwazelelelo kakhulu. Izolo, xa abazali bakhe bebethetha naye malunga nendlela abanokumnceda ngayo ukuba ajongane ngcono, uphendule wathi: "Ingxaki yile, ndiyasazi isikolo ngcono kunokuba ndisazi ekhaya." Yintoni gem. Lo mntwana unokuzazi ngakumbi kunabantu abadala!

Lixesha lokuba uyeke ukukhetha amadabi akho: masingabi semfazweni nabantwana bethu

Umama womntwana oneminyaka emi-4 onobukrakra ebesandula ukwenzeka kwiqela likaFacebook labazali babantwana "abanomoya" ukuba bafune isikhokelo ngokumisela imida. Impendulo emangalisayo ayifumeneyo yayikukuba "ukhethe amadabi akho." Ewe le nto ayisiyonto intsha kum, kodwa ngenxa yesizathu esithile kwesi sihlandlo, indinike ikhefu. Kundichukumisile njengelishwa ukuhlengahlengisa ingxaki yendlela yokujongana neemfuno zabantwana ezingapheliyo kwaye ezihlala zingenangqondo kunye nokudelela ngale ndlela yokulwa.

Ingcamango "yokukhetha iimfazwe" ibeka abazali kwisimo sengqondo sokukhusela-ukuba ulwa. Oku kukhokelela ekusondeleni kula maxesha xa abantwana bakho besenza kanye le nto i-DNA yabo ithi mabayenze-baxhase into abayifunayo okanye bangafuni ukusebenzisana nomda-kunye nokutsala kwakho. Imeko yobuzali yengqondo ikhokelela kuphela kwinto ozama ukuyiphepha: umzabalazo wamandla.

Ngapha koko, "ukukhetha amadabi" kuthetha ukuba ukhetha ukunikezela kwiimfuno zomntwana wakho okanye indelelo ngenxa yokuba zininzi kakhulu iimfazwe omele uziphathe wena okanye umntwana wakho. Ukuziqhelanisa, oku kuthetha ntoni kukuba useta amandla apho umntwana wakho efunda khona ukuba ukuba utyhala nzima ngokwaneleyo, uya kuthi ekugqibeleni akunxibe kwaye ahambe indlela yakhe. Esi sicwangciso siluncedo singqineke sisebenza kwaye ke sixhomekeke kusetyenziso lwexesha elizayo, elonyusa kuphela umzabalazo wamandla. Ikwabashiya uninzi lwabazali besiva benomsindo kwaye benenzondo ebantwaneni babo ngokubatyhalela kumda kunye nokubanyanzela ukuba balahle xa bengafuni kwaphela.

Awufuni ukuhamba phezu kwamaqokobhe amaqanda, uhlala uloyiko lokubeka umda ocinga ukuba ubalulekile, kuba woyika umsindo onokuthi uvele. Kwaye ayingombono olungileyo ukuba unikezele ngemida ocinga ukuba ibalulekile kwaye isempilweni emntwaneni wakho — ewe, yiyo loo nto abantwana benabazali! Umzekelo, ukuvuma kwisicelo se-10 somnye umboniso weTV kuba umntwana wakho usebenza luvo lwakho lokugqibela; ukuvumela umntwana wakho ukuba ahlale eminye imizuzu engama-30 eyongezelelweyo ukulibazisa umzabalazo ongenakuphepheka wokulala; okanye uvumele umntwana wakho enye ikhukhi ye-snack xa sele eneelekese ezininzi kwaye ubufuna ngokwenene ukuba abe nesiqhamo endaweni yoko.

Ayisiyokukhetha amadabi akho, imalunga nokukhetha eyona milinganiselo ucinga ukuba ilungele abantwana bakho kwaye uyiphumeze ngokuzolileyo nangothando, ngaphandle kokucaphuka komntwana wakho ngokungasoloko ufumana indlela yakhe.

Oku akuthethi ukuba awuguquki ngokupheleleyo. Ngapha koko, ngeli xesha lalo bhubhane, kuya kuba yimfuneko ukuziqhelanisa nenyani yakho entsha. Unokuthatha isigqibo sokuvumela ixesha elingaphezulu kwescreen kunye neencwadi ezininzi ngaphambi kokulala kuba usuku luye lwangxama kakhulu kunesiqhelo. Yintoni ephambili kukuba uthathe isigqibo ngesi sicwangciso. Awukwenzi oko ngenxa yoqhankqalazo lomntwana wakho okanye umsindo wakhe. (Uthe ixesha likamabonwakude liphelile, umntwana wakho uphosa i-epic meltdown, utshintshe ingqondo yakho kwaye uvumele i-TV engaphezulu.) Olo tshintsho lukhokelela kuninzi, kungabi mbalwa, ngumsindo, njengoko umntwana wakho efunda ukuba ukunyibilika sisicwangciso esisebenzayo sokufumana into ayifunayo.

Ke, cinga kwangaphambili malunga nokuba iya kuba yintoni na imithetho yakho emitsha, uthathela ingqalelo iimeko zangoku, kwaye unamathele kuzo. Xa umntwana wakho eqhankqalaza, yamkele into yokuba akayithandi imithetho yakho kwaye uqhubeke. Akukho sizathu sokuba ube nomsindo kuye ngenxa yobunzima kunye nomda. "Ewe, sivumela ixesha elingaphezulu kwesikrini phakathi evekini ngelixa isikolo sivaliwe kwaye umama notata kufuneka basebenze. Kodwa ngekhe ubukele iividiyo imini yonke. Ixesha liphelile. Xa ugqibile ukukhathazeka ngumgaqo, ndinako kukunceda ufumane enye into onokuyenza. " Into ongafuniyo ukuyenza ngumqolomba kuba umntwana wakho uphosa ingqumbo emva koko ubenomsindo ngaye ngokwenza ubomi bakho bube noxinzelelo.

Kwiimeko apho umntwana wakho esenza isicelo sokuqhubekeka-esiza kuba sininzi-yiba nomkhwa wokusivuma kwaye emva koko uzinike ixesha lokucinga ngaso ngaphambi kokwenza isigqibo. "Ndiyazi ukuba uyakuthanda ukubhaka ii-cookies kunye. Ndiyayithanda nam. Makhe ndicinge ngokuba sinalo na ixesha lokwenza oko namhlanje." Beka isibali mzuzu-ukunceda umntwana wakho alinde kwaye uqiniseke ukuba uyacinga ngaphambi kokuphendula. Emva koko mnike impendulo yakho. Oku kuthintela ukuba lusebenze. Ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokuba ungenza lo msebenzi, yazisa umntwana wakho ukuba ungayenza kunye namhlanje. Ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokuba ayilolusuku olulungileyo lokubhaka, mxelele ke ukuba usicingile ngesicelo sakhe kodwa akunakwenzeka. Ngokufanelekileyo, uya kumazisa xa niza kuba nexesha lokwenza oku kunye ngexesha elizayo.

Kubalulekile ukuba abantwana bakho bazi ukuba uya kuhlala uzithatha ngokungathí sina izicelo zabo. Ngamanye amaxesha iyakuba ngu "ewe" kodwa ngamanye amaxesha isenokuba ngu "hayi" Umzekelo, ngobusuku xa uthatha isigqibo sokuba kukho ixesha leencwadi ezimbalwa ezongezelelweyo ngaphambi kokucinywa kombane, yacaca ukuba le yimeko yobo busuku. Olunye ubusuku lungenakwenzeka.Musa ukulindela, nangona kunjalo, ukuba olu lungiselelo luya kuthintela ukubanomsindo ebusuku uthi "hayi" kwiincwadi ezongezelelweyo. Hlala uzolile kwaye uqhubeke: "Ndiyazi, uphoxekile kuba singenakuba neencwadi ezongezelelweyo ngokuhlwanje. Siqale kade ngexesha lokulala ngoko ke sinexesha lamabali amabini." Umntwana wakho uya kusinda ekukhathazekeni, okugcina kwakha ubhetyebhetye bokuziqhelanisa nezinto xa izinto zingahambi kanye njengoko elindele okanye afuna.

Kuthatha ezimbini ukulwa. Umntwana wakho unokuzama ukukutsalela kumzabalazo, kodwa akufuneki uthathe inxaxheba kumlo wemfazwe ongakulungelanga wena okanye abantwana bakho. Ukuzithemba malunga nemida obeka kuyo kunye nokuhlala unothando njengoko uyiphumeza kuya kwenza ukuba "ukhethe amadabi akho" aphelelwe lixesha.