Musa ukuba nguDick

Ihlabathi lizele zijezi. Iidick luhlobo olukhethekileyo lwejerk-ziyalicaphukisa ilizwe ngaphandle kolwazi lokuba bayakwenza oko, kwaye bayala ukuba banendima xa ubudlelwane buhamba gwenxa. Inyani elusizi yile, nabani na unokuba yidick ngamanye amaxesha.

Wazi njani umntu ukuba uyisidenge?

Kubantu abaninzi endixelele ngale ncwadi ukuza kuthi ga ngoku, uninzi luye lwathi:

"Wow, kulungile! Ndiqinisekile ukuba ndiza kuthenga iqela leekopi!"

"Intoni?" Ndiphendula, "Kutheni iqela lonke?"

"Kungenxa yokuba," uphendula umthengi onokubakho, "Ndizakufumanela wonke umntu ____________ wam" (ngesiqhelo impendulo ithi "lusapho" okanye "iofisi").

Ukubona indlela yokuziphatha kwe-dick kwabanye-njengakudala "uyayibona uyifumene" -isixhobo esihle kakhulu sokulinganisa ngokwazi xa usenziwa idick. Ukuba ngu-dick kusebenza njengesixhobo sokukhusela ekuqondeni, ekuvumeni, nasekubeni neyakho eyakho indima ekuxhaseni ubudlelwane obuphikisana kakhulu nehlabathi.

Umhlaba uya kusebenza nzima ukukunceda wazi xa sele uyidick; ukukuva ngomnye umcimbi. Ukuze wazi xa umntu eyinto edlakadlaka kufuneka ngandlel 'ithile aphume okanye akhulule iindlela zokuzikhusela (esihlala sidlala kwinto endiyibiza ngokuba yi "dickery") ukuze sizibone sikubudlelwane obuchasene nehlabathi.

Eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokwazi ukuba le ncwadi yeyakho kukuba ucinga ukuba uyithengele omnye umntu.

Zithini iimpawu zokuxela?

Ijerk eqhelekileyo ibonwa njengomntu okhohlakeleyo, oziquqelayo ocinga kwaye enze ngokungathi wonke umntu ehlabathini unokuqondwa kuphela-kwaye ekuphela kwento ebalulekiweyo echaziweyo-malunga nolwalamano lwabo kuye. Kodwa oku akufikeleli kwindlela yokuziphatha kukaDick, nangona ijongeka kwaye iziva ikhubekisa, eneneni isebenza njengokuzikhusela kwengqondo ethintela ukwazisa ngeemvakalelo ezisemngciphekweni njengokungazithembi, uloyiko kunye nokwenzakala.

Kukho isicatshulwa esimangalisayo esivela kwi-Alcoholics Anonymous esithi, "Sinyathela ezinzwaneni zabanye bethu kwaye bayaziphindezela. Ngamanye amaxesha bayasenzakalisa, babonakala bengenakucaphukisa, kodwa sifumanisa ukuba ... sithathe izigqibo ngokubhekisele kuthi kamva usibeke kwimeko yokuba senzakaliswe. " Esi sisimo sengqondo esithi "Ayindim onguwe" sisizathu esingunobangela- kunye nomqondiso oqaqambileyo wokugqwesa - sisimo sengqondo esenza ukuba i-jerk ingakwazi ukubona ukuba yena okanye yena uhlangabezana nohlaselo olungavumelekanga ngokwenene ukulwa.

Ngaba iidick zahlukile kwiijerik ezahlukeneyo? Ukuba kunjalo, njani?

Xa umntu ephawulwe, ephawulwe, okanye echongiwe ngenxa yokuziphatha kakubi kwilizwe (oko kukuthi, abanye abantu abakulo), akunamsebenzi ukuba ubabiza njani. Ungazibiza ngayo nantoni na oyifunayo (ukusuka "kwi-bleep" ukuya kwi-jerk ukuya kwi-motherf * ker). Ayilogama ulisebenzisayo, kodwa ulisebenzisa njani-yintoni le uyenzayo ngokuziphatha kwakho-exelela umhlaba: Lo ngudick.

Ukuba unendlela oziphethe ngayo eyahlukileyo egadini, indlela ozifunayo yokunxibelelana eyenzakalisayo neyoyikisayo kwabanye abantu, ungoyena mntu ubhekisa kuye njengo "dick" nokuba usebenzisa liphi igama ukuthambisa ukuvuthela. Ke, iidick kunye neejerks kunye noomama banokuba sisidalwa esinye ngokwendlela abazidibanisa ngayo, nabanye kunye nehlabathi.

Ivela njani indlela yokuziphatha dickish kwaye ibe yinxalenye yereertoire yomntu?

Ingqumbo enobulungisa ethanda ukuthethelela kunye nokwenza ipetroli. Ukuziphatha kwe-Dickish sisilungiso esisebenza ekuqaleni njengesixhobo sokulwa ukunciphisa ukuqonda koluntu ngokuhlala kwinto engenye evakalelwa njengendawo enobutshaba. Ukusuka kule meko, i-dick esakhasayo iza "kukuthemba" ukuba yena okanye umntu anokuthembela kwabanye ukuba abenzakalise, baxhaphaze kwaye badanise. Le ntembeko isebenza ukuseka imeko yokwoneliseka apho i-dick ikholelwa ekubeni inokuthembela kuye-kwaye ke ayifuni mntu. Kwi-dick, uluvo lokungabikho kokusesikweni okungapheliyo lubonisa indlela yokuziphatha ehlaselayo / ekhuselayo eyahlula yena- okanye yena kwihlabathi elivakalelwa-ngesiqhelo kwasekuqaleni kobomi-bakhe engakhuselekanga.

Ngaba indlela yokuziphatha dickish ikhusela njani?

U-dick usebenzisa indlela abaziphethe ngayo njengokuzikhusela ngokwasemphefumlweni nxamnye nokuziva besemngciphekweni. Oku kunamava njengemo yoxinzelelo kunye nokukhuseleka okwethutyana, apho umntu azibonayo izizathu kunye neemvakalelo ezingaphantsi kokuziphatha kwakhe kwabanye (ingqikelelo). U-dick uhlala kwimeko yokwala eqiniswe yimfuno yokuphepha eyakhe indawo kuyo nayiphi na into ehamba kakubi kubudlelwane. Ndicela umfundi ukuba abone le ndlela yokuziphatha ehlengahlengiswa eqala njengesixhobo sokusinda esenzelwe ukuzikhusela ekuxinezelweni lixhala (lendawo yokunxibelelana).

Kutheni le nto ukholelwa ukuba sihlangabezana nobhubhane wokuziphatha kakubi?

Ngobuninzi be-angst, ukwahlukana okungaka kuluntu lwethu (ubuntamo-lukhuni, ukubekelwa ecaleni, uhanahaniso, ukubulala), iidick zisebenza njenge-scapegoats kwinto esingayithandiyo nesingayamkeliyo ngathi. Ngokuziphatha kwabo bayakwazi ukujonga ubuncinci njengoyena unoxanduva lwento yonke engahambi kakuhle kubudlelwane, usapho, uluntu okanye uluntu. U-dick uvumela wonke umntu ukuba ashiye ikhonkco kwinxalenye yenkqubo / ubudlelwane bomtshato nje ngokuba ngu-dick. Nangona kunjalo, abona dick banelungelo abavumelani nolo vavanyo, bayala ukuba nangayiphi na indlela baphendule ngayo nayiphi na into engahambi kakuhle, kwaye endaweni yoko, babange uxanduva lwayo yonke into-yonke into-ihamba kakuhle!

Kwaye okwahlukileyo kokuziphatha kwejerkish ngu ...?

Ukwamkela iziqu zethu, abanye kunye nehlabathi ngokwalo-njengoko kunjalo.

Ucacile ukuba ujonge iidick, ungenaso isixhobo sokutsala i-dick, ulungile kubudlelwane. Nceda ucacise.

Kufuneka sazi ukuba ngoobani iidick kubomi bethu (iofisi, usapho olwandisiweyo, njl.njl.) Kwaye sigcine umgama ngokwasemzimbeni nangokweemvakalelo. Kodwa xa sijongana ne "dick yangaphakathi," asiyi kuba nomtsalane nakwezinye iidick. Iidick zihlala zifumana. Ke ngoko, ukujongana ne-dick yangaphakathi kuyasikhusela "kwi-dick yangaphandle," ke ngekhe ubeke iliso kwaye ujikeleze indlela yokuziphatha engalunganga yabanye abantu.

Ngaba ungashwankathela into oyibiza ngokuba yi-Dick Fix? Zeziphi izinto eziyimfuneko zokushiya i-dickery ngasemva?

I-Dick Fix, mhlawumbi ngokungaqhelekanga, ukuzamkela, abanye kunye nehlabathi. Ngokwamkela kuza noxanduva lokuphendula, kwaye oku kuthetha ukuba noxanduva lokuphendula ngegalelo lethu kwihlabathi (nakwabanye), kunye nemvakalelo yobunini. Ngale nto ndinemigaqo emibini:

1. Gcina ingqalelo,

2. Jonga umgaqo # 1.

Yiyo leyo. Uninzi lwe-dickery yimpendulo ebangelwa yinkolelo yokuba izinto ziyenziwa kuthi-izinto ezisilimazayo nezisoyikisayo kwaye zingaphandle kolawulo lwethu. Ukwamkelwa, ukuphendula, kunye nobunini (kwicala lethu) ekugqibeleni kusivumela ukuba sihlale ngoxolo nathi kunye nabanye.

Ngaba kukho impendulo efanelekileyo kuluntu lokujongela phantsi omnye umntu?

Ukubetha kancinci, kwaye ungazibandakanyi. Le yiSatyagraha: Uqhanqalazo olungenabundlobongela. Kukuzibophelela ekuzinikeleni ekonzakaliseni mntu, kubandakanya nathi-singazibeki engozini, singavumeli abanye ukuba basiphathe kakubi.

Yintoni ocinga ukuba ngowona myalezo ubalulekileyo ungathanda ukuba abafundi bafumane kuwo Ungabi nguDick?

Ukuyeka ukuzikhusela ekusebenziseni i-dickery kuseka indlela eyahlukileyo yokuba kulwalamano nathi, abanye kunye nehlabathi. Yinkqubo apho ukutshintsha kwethu kunokutshintsha umhlaba.

Malunga noMBHALI UTHETHA: Ababhali abakhethiweyo, ngawabo amazwi, baveze ibali elingemva kwebali. Ababhali bavezwa benombulelo kwindawo yokubhengeza ngendlu yabo yokupapasha.

Ukuthenga le ncwadi, ndwendwela:

Musa ukuba nguDick