Uthando (okanye into) ekuboneni kokuqala

Kukangaphi ufunda okanye usiva amabali abantu abathi "bendisazi kwasekuqaleni ukuba nguYe lo?" Kwiimeko ezininzi babenyanisile, kananjalo, kuba esi sisicatshulwa esivela kwisibini emtshatweni wabo okanye nakwizibini ezitshatileyo iminyaka engama-50. Ndiyibona rhoqo kwaye ndihlala ndibethwa yile ngxelo. Imbali yohlaziyo mhlawumbi.

Ndifumene enye yezi zinto kwi-NY Times Times kule veki. Umfazi oneminyaka engamashumi amathandathu athetha ngexesha lokuqala wabona indoda awatshata nayo ekugqibeleni. Babebancinci bengekakwishumi elivisayo. Ndazixelela ukuba, "ngoku angayazi njani le nto?"

Iinkcazo ezininzi zacebisa ukuba: lo mfo wayebonakala eqhelekile kuba wayemkhumbuza ngabantakwabo okanye utata wakhe, wayenomdla kuye (ivumba, isandi selizwi, njl. Njl. ibiyintoni leyo. Kwaye ubuncinci, wamazi njengemphefumlo wakhe (kubomi bangaphambili? Ilizwi endlebeni yakhe? Ngommiselo weSiphelo?)

Ndiyazi kakuhle ngokutsala. Abanye abantu basetyhini bathanda amadoda amade, ubude bungcono, yiyo loo nto ubona uninzi lwabasetyhini abancinci be-5 'okanye kunjalo nabadlali bebhasikithi abahamba ngokuzingca kunye nangona encokola nomngxunya wakhe wengalo! Amadoda amaninzi atsalelekile kumfazi - encinci le kwaye inkulu, okanye nantoni na - kwaye siyazi ukuba ayizukuhlala ubomi bonke. Kungekudala lowo unomfanekiso othandekayo uya kuphulukana nokuzala okanye ukuba mdala nje kwaye umfazi omncinci angadinwa kukungahambi kakuhle kweenyawo ezi-2 ezimfutshane kuneqabane lakhe.

Enye into enokwenzeka kukuba, ngelixa umtsalane wokuqala uza kuphela, baya kukhula bathandane kwaye bayathandana, bamkele omnye umntu wokwenene ngaphakathi. Sonke sinethemba lokuba kubudlelwane bexesha elide. Ndiyacinga, nangona kunjalo, ukuba akunakwenzeka uthando omnye komnye ekuboneni kokuqala. Kuya kufuneka uyazi ukuba ezinye izandi kunye namavumba athini, indlela asabela ngayo kuxinzelelo, nokuba bahlangana njani nosapho lwabo, phambi kokuba uthathe izigqibo malunga nothando okanye umtshato.

Ndihlala ndilumkisa abantu abadibana kwi-Intanethi kwaye "bathandana" ngembalelwano ukuba abanokwazi okwangoku. Ngokwenyani umntu kufuneka "azive", ngokoqobo, zomnye umntu ngaphambi kokuthatha isigqibo ngayo nayiphi na into yexesha elide. Oku kunjalo apha eUnited States apho uninzi lwabantu lulindele ukuba uthando lwandulele umtshato kwaye ngethemba lokuba aluzukukhula luthande omnye komnye kule minyaka idlulileyo. Kuxhomekeka kulindelo nakwinkcubeko yomntu.

Ke, ngaba lukhona uthando ekuboneni kuqala? Ndiyathandabuza kakhulu. Ngaba umntu "unokwazi" ukuba Nguye Lowo? Ngokunokwenzeka, ukuba ukhetho lomntu kwiqabane kukutsala, lwazi okanye lincinci. Ngokuqinisekileyo umntu angayiqonda into yokuba “ngumphefumlo” emva kweentsuku ezimbalwa kuphela xa omnye nomnye wabona ukufana okuninzi kumaxabiso kunye nokujonga ubomi kunye nokubona indlela imizimba yakho enokuthi okanye ilunge ngayo kunye, indlela elinye elinuka ngayo nezandi. Ngaba ungonwaba kumaqabane obomi? Ukuba uyamkela, uhlala .... kwaye ukuba unethamsanqa.