Ngaba Usindisiwe Okanye Ulungele?

Ukukhulisa abantwana abomeleleyo yiyo yonke ingqumbo, elungileyo inikezwe unxibelelwano olusondeleyo kwimpilo yengqondo iyonke.

Kwincwadi yabo Ukukhula Ukomelela Ababhali uTatyana Barankin kunye noNazilla Khanlou bayacebisa, "Abantu abomeleleyo banokujamelana ngokufanelekileyo, okanye baziqhelanise noxinzelelo kunye nemingeni yobomi. Bafunda kumava okwazi ukulawula ngokuchanekileyo kwimeko enye, ibenza ukuba bakwazi ukumelana noxinzelelo kunye nemiceli mngeni kwixesha elizayo ”(UBarankin noKhanlou, 2007).

Kwicala lakhe, uBonnie Benard, uM.S.W. , "Sonke sizalwe sinamandla okuzalwa, sinamandla okuphucula iimpawu ezifumaneka ngokufuthi kubantu abasindileyo: ubuchule ekuhlaleni (ukuphendula, ukuguquguquka kwenkcubeko, uvelwano, inkathalo, izakhono zonxibelelwano kunye noburharha); ukusombulula iingxaki (ukucwangcisa, ukufuna uncedo, ukucinga nzulu nokuyila); ukuzimela (ukuqonda isazisi, ukusebenza ngokukuko, ukuzazi ngokwakho, ukumilisela umsebenzi, kunye nokuguqula kude kwimiyalezo emibi kunye neemeko); kunye nemvakalelo yenjongo kunye nokukholelwa kwikamva eliqaqambileyo (umkhombandlela weenjongo, iminqweno kwezemfundo, ithemba, ukholo, nokunxibelelana ngokwasemoyeni) ”(Benard, 2021).

Iindaba ezimnandi ngakumbi zinokufumaneka kutshanje Ijenali yeWall Street inqaku elithi, Ngaphandle kweengozi zokuqhambuka kweCovid-19, iinkampu zasehlotyeni ziyagcwalisa ngokukhawuleza, ”engqina imizamo ephumeleleyo yeenkampu zasehlotyeni ezavulwa ngokukhuselekileyo ngo-2020 okanye zenza imephu yenkqubo ka-2021.

Ke yintoni ikhonkco phakathi kwenkampu kunye nokomelela? Kwakhe Imagazini yeeKampu inqaku elithi, "Iikampu Zinceda Ukwenza Abantwana Bomelele," uMichael Ungar, Ph.D., uthi, "Xa kufikwa kumba wokomelela, ukukhulisa indalo yamaxilongo. Iinkampu, njengezikolo ezifanelekileyo kunye neentsapho ezinothando, zigonya abantwana kwiingxaki ngokubanika uxinzelelo olunokulawuleka kunye neenkxaso abazidingayo ukuze bafunde ukumelana ngokukuko nangeendlela eziguqukayo ... ”(Ungar, 2012).

U-Ungar uqhubeka nokudibanisa amava asixhenxe afuna abantwana.

1. Ubudlelwane obutsha, hayi ngoontanga kuphela, kodwa nabantu abadala abathembekileyo ngaphandle kwabazali babantwana.
2. Isazisi esinamandla oko kwenza ukuba abantwana bazive bezithembile phambi kwabanye, kubonelela abantwana ngento yokwenene abangayithanda ngabo
3. Iinkampu zinceda abantwana baziva belawula ubomi babo.
4. Iikampu ziqinisekisa ukuba bonke abantwana baphathwa kakuhle.
5. Kwinkampu, abantwana bafumana into abayidingayo ukuze bakhule ngokwasemzimbeni.
6. Mhlawumbi okona kubaluleke kakhulu, iinkampu zinika abantwana ithuba ukuziva ngathi bangababo.
7. Iinkampu zinokunika abantwana ukuqonda okungcono kwenkcubeko yabo.

Ixabiso lokufunda - kunye nokuziqhelanisa - ukomelela kwinkampu yasehlotyeni kwafakwa kwintetho ka-Cameron Grey owayeneminyaka eli-16 ubudala ngelo xesha wanika iinkampi ezincinci kwindima yakhe njengenkokeli yolutsha eCamp Hazen eConnecticut. Uye wabelana nam nge Zoom.

Ndifuna nonke nicinge ngento enilunge ngayo, mhlawumbi umdlalo okanye isakhono enisifunde ekampini. Ngoku, ndifuna ukuba ucinge indlela onokuba nesakhono ngayo kuloo msebenzi mnye ukuba awukhe wasilela ngelixa uzama. Mhlawumbi intle kakhulu, akunjalo?

Yintoni ukusilela? Ewe, abantu bayichaza ngokungaphumeleli okanye ukungalungi ngokwaneleyo. Nangona kunjalo, ndibona ukusilela njengokuphumelela. Elinye lawamazwi endiwathandayo "kukusilela phambili." Oku kuthetha ukuba ukuze uqhubele phambili, kufuneka ube nomqobo.

Ndifuna ukuyenza icace kuni nonke ngoku ukuba ukusilela kulungile kwaye kuyafuneka ukuqhubela phambili ebomini. Xa sonke sasibancinci, uninzi ukuba ayingabo bonke abazali bethu abasilumkisayo ukuba singaze sibambe isitovu xa sisebenza. Wenze ntoni ngokulandelayo? Ukhe wayichukumisa kodwa uqikelele, ngoku uyazi ukuba ungaze uphinde ubambe isitovu esishushu kwakhona.

Makhe ndikuthathe ndibuyele kunyaka omtsha. Bendihleli kwiklasi yembali yehlabathi ndilinde ukubuyela kuvavanyo lwam. Ndicinga ukuba ndenze ngokumangalisayo, ndabuza utitshala wam ukuba leliphi elona nqaku libi. Uthe iipesenti ezingama-57. Ndothuka ndathi kum, “Sisidenge esinjani esinama-57%?” Ndifumene iipesenti ezingama-57. Ndandisisidenge eso. Ngokwenyani, le ngxaki indenze ndangumfundi ophucukileyo. Lo ngumzekelo nje omnye wendlela ukusilela okuncinci okuye kwandityhalela ngayo empumelelweni.

Ngoku kuwe, inokuba kuphuma eGaga okanye ushenxise iAlpine Tower kanye njengokuba sele uza kufika phezulu. Nokuba luphi uhlobo lokungaphumeleli, nokuba imeko ithini, funda kokungahambi kakuhle, kwaye ekugqibeleni, uya kuziqonda iinjongo zakho.

Inqaku lam ngayo yonke le mizekelo kukuqinisekisa ukuba nonke niyazi ukuba ukusilela phambili kubalulekile ekukhuleni komntu.

Ndiza kukuxelela elinye ibali. Malunga neenyanga ezimbini ezidlulileyo, ndandidlala umdlalo wesithathu kumdlalo webaseball. Umbethi wabetha ibhola enzima kum, yathatha i-hop embi emva koko, i-BOOM. Ndijonge esibhakabhakeni ligazi ebusweni nasebusweni. Eli thuba alikhange lisilele kodwa amava okufunda andifundise ukuba ndisoloko ndigcina isandla sam sasekunene xa ndithatha iibhola zomhlaba.

Nangona kunjalo, amava okufunda ayisoloko kufuneka abethwe ebusweni ngebhola. Isenokuba ncinci njengokuthetha into engeyiyo ngexesha elingalunganga kwaye unale nto uyithethileyo ichithe ubudlelwane obenabo naloo mntu.

Newsflash, ukusilela phambili yindlela yokuhamba. Nokuba kwenzeka ntoni okanye leliphi ibakala olifumanayo okanye nakuphi na ukubuyela umva onako, soloko uyazi ukuba iinkokeli ziba ziinkokheli ezinkulu ukusilela kunye neempazamo.

Ngoku kuni, ndinomceli mngeni, ndifuna elowo kuni afunde kwimpazamo yale veki izayo kwaye akhumbule ukusilela phambili.

Ewe abantwana bafunda ukomelela ekhaya. U-Lizzy Francis, kwinqaku lakhe elithi "Abantwana abaQinisekayo bavela kuBazali abenza ezi zinto zisi-8," uthi, "Xa usemncinci, yonke into iyintlekele. Ishizi yakho eyosiweyo ine-crust on? Uloyiko. Awunakho ukudibanisa iseti yeLego? Unokuba ubambe unyuke unyuka usihla. Awunakukutshintsha oku. Into onokuyenza, nangona kunjalo, yixhobise umntwana wakho ngeendlela ezibafundisa indlela yokubuyela umva kwimizabalazo yabo yemihla ngemihla ukuze, kamva ebomini, xa izibonda ziphezulu, bazi ukuba mabenze ntoni (uFrancis, 2018) . NgokukaFrancis, abazali babantwana abomeleleyo benza izinto ezisibhozo ezilandelayo. Bona:

1. Vumela abantwana bazabalaze
2. Bayeke abantwana babo bafumane ukwaliwa
3. Sukuyivuyela imeko yexhoba
4. Yenza okungaphezulu kunokubaxelela ukuba "bakhuphe" xa kusenzeka umzabalazo
5. Nceda abantwana babo bafunde indlela yokubhala iimvakalelo zabo kunye neemvakalelo
6. Nika abantwana babo izixhobo zokuzonwabisa
7. Zivume iimpazamo zabo. Kwaye emva koko bayazilungisa
8. Soloko uqhagamshela ukuzixabisa kwabantwana babo kwinqanaba labo lomzamo

Mhlawumbi ayothusi into yokuba kweli xesha lobhubhani, ukomelela kuthathe indawo. Idatha entsha evela kwiziko loPhando lwaBafundi kunye neMfundo (i-CARE) kunye neTotal Brain ityhila ukuba abafundi bezikolo eziphakamileyo kunye neekholeji bafumana amanqaku angaphantsi kwe-50 yepesenti yokuzibamba kwaye, ngakumbi, ukomelela.

Oko kwenza iindima zeenkampu zasehlotyeni kunye nabazali zibaluleke kakhulu ... kwaye zingxamisekile.

Ngokudibeneyo, akukho mfuneko yokubahlangula abantwana bethu kodwa kunoko sibancede ukubenza balilungele ilizwe elizayo, nayo yonke imiceli mngeni kunye nokungaqiniseki.

IBenard, B. (2021). Iziseko zesakhelo someleleyo. Ukomelela ngokuSebenza. https://www.resiliency.com/free-articles-resource/the-foundations-of-the-resiliency-framework/ (18 Jan. 2021).

UBenard, B. (1991). Ukukhuthaza ukomelela kwabantwana: Izinto ezikhuselayo kusapho, eSikolweni, nakuLuntu. IPortland, OKANYE iZiko laseNtshona leZikolo eziNgenaZiyobisi kunye noLuntu.

UFrancis, L. (2018). Abantwana abomeleleyo bavela kubazali abenza ezi zinto zisi-8. Ootata. NgoNovemba 26, 2018. https://www.fatherly.com/love-money/build-resilient-kids-prepared-for-life/ (18 Jan. 2021).

IKeates, N. (2021). Ngaphandle komngcipheko wokuqhambuka kweCovid-19, iinkampu zasehlotyeni ziyagcwaliswa ngokukhawuleza. Ijenali yeWall Street. Nge-12 kaJanuwari ka-2021.

Abasebenzi bekliniki yaseMayo. (Ngo-2020). Ukomelela: ukwakha izakhono zokunyamezela ubunzima. Nge-Okthobha 27, 2020. https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/resilience-training/in-depth/resilience/art-20046311 (18 Jan. 2021).

Ungar, M. (2012). Iinkampu zinceda ukwenza abantwana bakwazi ukomelela. Imagazini yeeKampu. NgoSeptemba / Okthobha 2012. https://www.acacamps.org/resource-library/camping-magazine/camps-help-make-children-resilient (18 Jan. 2021).